Advice is a one-way street without you necessarily having the tools to navigate the way. Coaching is the means to ensure the tools are in place, through collaboration, to navigate most pathways.
I have been reluctant to specifically use the current global crisis as a reason for people to engage in a coaching program. But the crisis is dragging on and already many are experiencing much difficulty. It is always easier to give advice, the person leaves and uses the advice as she pleases. Most people don’t get the necessary assistance through advice. A typical example I always use and it is a very real example is: A couple is happily married. So happy and in tune are they that they never argue or have notable disagreements. As others will say of them “the perfect couple”. One day, the husband comes home and the wife informs him that she is leaving since the marriage is not working for her. He is stunned since he saw a good marriage.
Were I to give you advice such as “It is necessary to have ‘arguments’ because it is helpful in a relationship”, then it not confined to you but also, likely, not entirely suitable for you specifically. This advice can mean many things and it also needs to be understood in context. One person may deliberately look to argue with his spouse and this can result in a failed marriage. Another may accept arguments in the relationship but be unable to understand how to resolve and deal with these situations. Yet, in all these cases including the original case, the focus is on one aspect of a relationship while marriage and relationships have many facets. In short, one piece of advice is not the solution since context must be built. This is but an example that advice in these testing times is needed, but the application and proper context allow for broad-based long- term solutions. Advice is free because there are no comebacks, you take “something” and off you go on your own. Coaching, though, is through a collaborative plan that best suits you and this is the meaningful way to go forward with a greater degree of confidence.
Life means your life and, in that life, you have family and friends. Other people can only depend on you when you can actually take care of yourself and then have the capacity to help others. We live in tough times and more tough times lie ahead – prepare yourself well.
visit www.itsmylifecoach.co.za
picture courtesy: https://1funny.com/messed-up-roads/
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