“The more things change the more they stay the same”. This is indeed true when it comes to marriage. The case of male versus female, husband versus wife and the proverbial “men are from Mars, women are from Venus” rings true every time. Still, though, it is important to choose the right spouse, albeit not quite ideal.
Love, in all its different manifestations, certainly plays with the heart strings until you are convinced that the person you chose is indeed the one you want as a spouse. Love which is seated in an organ that claims dominion of the body, often overpowers every other sensory organ and then the brain. Love claims to be the only reason why two people should be together in holy matrimony. In a true story, a man filed for divorce the morning after the wedding because he literally saw his wife for the first time. She was a different person with whom he fell in love and married. He fell in love with someone who virtually transformed herself with make-up. He actually had the fright of his life when he saw her the next morning in bed. It brings us to something called compatibility. Compatibility has always been important and should be part of the decision-making process in choosing a spouse. Perhaps in earlier times, it was fairly straightforward but with the complexity of life today, people can be caught up in this complexity much like being trapped in a maze. Compatibility has meaning and can be expanded to various points of interest, but not infinitely so as to get more confused, then get lost in the analysis and then turn down what may have been the ideal spouse for you. Those with simpler lifestyles will more than likely choose simpler compatibility tests. Compatibility tests can be done retrospectively but, in such cases, should be used only as positive tool in trying to improve some areas of the marriage. There is a marriage, and it should preferably be saved, rather looking for the excuse to end it. As for those not yet married, it must be used as a tool to create more certainty on the two people set to spend the rest of their lives together. The word “certainty” is used in a general way since curveballs, the permissible ones, are part and parcel of marriage.
The choice of wedding dress should not take priority over the choice of spouse. For the married person, perhaps in addressing the matter of compatibility, there may be one or two less fights and more acceptance. Take the step to peace of mind and don’t blame anything on being blinded by love but let the love abide with you always.
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