“It is better to sit in the company of good people than to sit alone. And it is better to sit alone than in the company of bad people”. Those with whom you associate influence you in some way. With good people you may adopt even the smallest good action or thought. With bad people, it is enough that you remain quiet and seated with them, while they engage in wrong, to be one of them.
The influence of someone over you is best judged on its outcome. A positive influence must always be welcomed. However, you find, many times, that there is negative emotional energy after meeting someone. You may not be aware of it but, after that, your actions and even conversations will have some bitterness in it. An example of such negativity: You are happy and satisfied in your relationship. You have accepted some attributes of your husband although it is not quite what you’d want, but it does not make you unhappy. A friend comes by and in the conversation she discusses how her husband is always taking her places. Then adds to that that she will not accept a husband like yours. You are on the back foot and embarrassed. You have accepted that you are the one who encourages him to take you places and it is not his natural inclination to initiate anything in matters like this. However, a wave of negativity has permeated your being and the emotion is not a happy one. Your friend leaves and soon after your husband arrives. With this negative emotion running through your veins, you find fault with even the slightest action of your husband at that point. Matters escalate and, out of nothing, nay from a period of happiness, the tide has completely turned. How friends influence and impact relationships when matters were healthy and yet, a wee word, planted a seed or is it weed.
It is necessary to park the comments from “outsiders” when it pertains to any relationship, be it husband/wife, father/son, employer/employee, etc. Many comments may be innocent but if it induces negativity, then disregard it. Of course, positivity breeds love and growth. The relationship with friends cannot also necessarily be broken when no harm was intended. It is, however, to learn to steer a conversation on the one hand, and to have a strong filter on the other hand. These are skills and traits to learn. The important add-on here is that conversations should not be one of gossip and friendship with a gossip-monger should be avoided. This note was really to focus on a seemingly innocent comment having far-reaching negative consequences.
Stay strong. Love unconditionally. Build tight bonds.
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